Merry Flippin Christmas And A Happy New Year!

Hello!!! How was the holidays? Holidays in my family are a recipe for disaster. Well, I bought myself a couple of CD's, 21st Century Breakdown and Dangerous. While taking the plastic wrapping off, I impaled my mother with a Green Day CD. The corner hit her on the ankle bone. Well, my bad. My family decided to break out all the German traditions this year, tirbuted to Uncle Herb, so we opened presents on Christmas Eve. Once everyone was hammered and loopy, dinner was over and we were on the phone with Uncle Rick, discussing what it would be like if our family won the lottery and got our own TV show. I "played Santa" this year, and by the end, I was tearing paper off to get to the bottom of the pile. My brother got three packs of microwaveable Chow Mien and five packages of underwear. I got five pairs of socks and a lot of Michael Jackson and The Beatles stuff. Bro has this *brilliant* idea.
"NEW GAME! How about, everytime someone opens a present, you do a shot."
That worked REALLY well. Haha, after a night of non-stop Carpenters, everyone had had enough so we went to bed. On Christmas Day, we drove down to Connecticut. There is NO place like home. We get to my Aunt Jay's house, and my second cousins Marisa and Tyler and my cousins Chris and Micky were there along with the whole Brizz gang. Jay, Larry, mom, dad, Mike, me, Fran, Kev, Eric, Jack, mem, and Steve. Steve shared awesome stories with us about his hairy back and how Nair works so well. Wow, thanks. I really needed to know that. My brother and Steve were gettin to Marisa real well because they kept calling her goth and she was FREAKING out. Calm down, sparky. They're just being themselves. Marisa precedes to tell me about her boyfriend. Her parents think he's gay because his name is Alexis, his favorite color is purple, and his favorite movies are Mean Girls and The Notebook... Sounds straight to me! ;-) Micky was loading up on the drinks. Rather than rum and coke, she was going for vodka and coke, which turned into vodka with a shot of coke. By the end of Christmas, everyone was cursing and so drunk, they could've given Mem a heart attack. The next day was Aunt Fran's birthday. We decided to go to the mall, so we swung by Aunt Jays to pick up Jay, Marisa and Micky. The mall was freakin' packed, but we trailed along, dragging Micky in all of her hungover glory along with us. Drunk people are really funny. But when your entire Christmas is bombarded with alcoholics, it's really unerving. Haha, after shopping for four hours, we went out to dinner for Aunt Fran's birthday. It was an extreme task trying to scope out a joint that would seat 17 people, we now had Jen and Dean joining us. We found a place and everyone meets up. This PAINSTAKINGLY long dinner consisted of me and Marisa simultaneously texting, the bro and I exchanging akward glances, and Steve shooting me weird looks I couldn't decipher. I looked over to the other end of the table and Steve goes "Jenn, turn your head. I don't want to tell you this" and continues to tell a story inappropriate for anyone my age. He also called me a redneck or something, but I've stopped processing what the druken idiot says about three years ago. He was going to take Mike and Ty out after dinner and says "That's it! I'm not touching anymore of these damn kids! I took Eric out, and got in trouble for that! Then I took Jaclyn out to get her belly button pierced and almost got in BIG trouble for that! No more" With that, he ends up taking Mike and Ty and even when Mike is supposed to drive, Steve takes the wheel and all the parents are going ballistic. Yep, that's a holiday with my family if I've ever had one. How was your holiday? If you have any great fantastic stories, I'll be glad to post them. God knows, I'm running out of things to post. You can only say so many things about your freakin' crazy family. Peace out!

Thanksgiving Was Great. And How About This Twitter Craze?

You ever read something that you wrote and think it's really hilarious. Well, I do and I just have to share.
"November 17, 2009
Heyo!! Dude, in contemporary 4-5 we learned a four minute Turkey-Jam in less than two hours. It's probably the best holiday themed dance ever choreographed. The Pat-Y-O Workshop was WICKED t.s.n.y. I think Pat-Y-O is a J-BreeZ fan. :-P My birthday was also wicked great. I got a ton of money and some sick stuff and the LINKIN PARK ROAD TO REVOLUTION DVD/CD. Sully says I'll be getting my present from... PJ MACWILLIAMS BON BON soon. What a name. Haha. We get to go to Connecticut fo' T-Giving. Way better than the nerdbombed celebration of '08. That had "gay" written all over it. But I love it down in Thomaston, so this should be fun. G'night!"

That Thanksgiving turned out to be the most entertaining holiday of all time. The Brizz Fam gets crazier by the season. As my bro says, he got to see the loving, caring family that would all get together and pray before they eat. I get the family where everyone shows up drunk and yelling, and just cackle when g-ma is the only one saying grace. Oh lord, what a generaton gap. Hah, one of my personal favorite scenarios of the weekend:
Steve (cousin): "Well, thanks mom. I'm about to head out. Let me just grab some booze before I leave." (Grabs a full bottle of vodka.)
Mike (brother): "Steve, you are a sh*tty human."
Steve: "Don't worry. I'll return it tomorrow... Empty."
Awesome. Gotta love the family. According to my mem' and her ever-decayin memory, she was a great dancer when she was younger and could put both her legs behind her head. Yeah, okay gram. She's crazy.
WE die when love is dead. We lost a dream we never had.
~LOVE.IS.DEAD [tokio hotel]
We had UN LATE START today! Who doesn't love an extra two hours of sleep? No one! With the exception of people who don't like them.
I think Twitter is really entertaining. Not just because I can publicize the best blog EVER and not to mention... my website:-) but because it shows how ridiculous people are and how much some kids need attention. Today, I just discovered after having a twitter for... 7 months now? that if you click @lpkidd or whatever your name is, it shows all the tweets that are replied to you. WHOA. I read them and almost all of them were girls from school.
"Heyyyyyyyyy follow me?????????"
"Hey sista. follow me!"
"whoa, you're on here?!? follow me!"
The only person I'm gonna follow out of all of those is the one who said,
"HEYY! I didn't know there were any other average people on here."
Take that, chikas. QUOTE ME ON THIS, IT WILL BE FAMOUS. A person is not defined by the number of followers they have, but by the quality of their tweets. Thank you. And good night.

I Like Yelling "SHINODA!" While Reading Phoenix Tweet About Tiger Woods

Alright Tiger, what's the story? Can we not drive 10 feet from our house without upsetting half the women in America? I mean really, not bad enough that he'd been doing this for so long, but he's the only black golfer in America. Tiger's wife got an offer for a golf club line that you can beat Tiger Woods with. :-) My hero right now is Phoenix from Linkin Park (the bass player) for tweeting this joke to the Twitter community. What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops at three ho's. What a slap in the face. Haha I love to yell "SHINODA" every chance I get. My friend saw him on the Grammy Award Nominee show, texts me: "SHINODA! Turn the Grammy's on!". At school I just say SHINODA in the hallways. It's more than good. It's grrrreat! Today, I went and baked cookies for the needy at the church. It was a freakin' bucket of fun. In all seriousness, it was pretty fun. There were some kids from my school there and I dragged one of my buddies there and we were kicking cookie ass. We definetly beat the high schoolers. But we had that thing goin on where there was this group of kids that did NOT look at all like they were in eighth grade. So we looked on the sign in sheet and they were. I think maybe they lied... or got held back? I'm not judging. My spidey-sense was tingling, that's all. I hope you're enjoying the blog and if you're a true brizztidbits fan, you'll jump on the SHINODA craze.

Oh Winter. The Worst Point Of The School Year, Fuzzy Socks and Christmakwanzuka (Winter Solstice)

Happy December! Winter, to me, is THE worst part of the year. And as luck will have it, I'm landed in the section of the United States where winter is longer than most of the other seasons. Awesome. Even though we get a lot of vacation days and snow days away from school, I think it's the worst part of the school year besides March. Winter at school is when you discover what the year will truly be like. It's when teachers pile on the projects that count for 200% percent of your grade and give you three days to do it. Are you passing math, because I believe 200% would be your grade in two trimesters. Tricky. Plus, you find out who the kids are that you TRULY despise and who you should stick to in your classes. People's dark sides come out, trust me. My favorite confidence-wrecker is when kids are like "oh man, I'm just so good at this subject" then recieve a progress report and it has a big fat F for FAILURE of it. Classic. Why just the other day in math (my FAVORITE subject *roll eyes unappreciatively) a boy goes "Ah, I'm so good at math" to himself. After correcting the homework, he precedes to ask the teacher if she can put numbers 5-18 on the board. The assignment was 5-25. 7 right. Yeah, you're just a freakin' genius. Also, winter is when our first report cards come out, and there's always a couple of the slackers that come out with B's. How does that happen. We should all just stop trying and we'll succeed in life. THIS BLOG HAS THE SECRET TO LIFE. If you don't try, you will succeed. Simple as that. Some good things about winter would be the fact that you can wear all the slammin' fuzzy socks you want and not have heat stroke. I am a HUGE fan of socks, so this is a big deal for me. Next time you want to wish someone a winter greeting, don't take the chance of offending any religion and say Happy Christmakwanzuka Winter Solstice. It combines Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah and Winter Solstice all together. It's a fool proof way of bringing holiday cheer. LOL(Lots.Of.Love) ~ your favorite blog writer :-)

Teachers Really Do Hate Students. And Aids Don't Even Have A Purpose. They're Like Teachers... But Not

Hello world!!!!!!!!!! How is my favorite blog-reading community today? It twas a great day today, aside from all of the boring-butt teachers who are only concerned with teaching long enough to get a pension. I SWEAR that some people only become lunch monitors and aids to be rude to kids and get away with it.
For one thing, my that teacher today is totally hunky dorky with this kid who is freaking the flip out about Santa Clause and pretending to shoot people. But yet if I tell him to "shut up" or "put a sock in it", I'm suddenly the criminal. Okkkkay.
At lunch today, it was several of my friends birthdays, so my buddy Flip brought in Chinese food for just our table to eat. We were having a grand ol time, flaunting our asian-induced goodness, when some lunch monitor comes over.
"I want to eat at THIS table! Whose birthday is it?"
The woman was OBVIOUSLY begging for food. Look lady, you get to cut any and all the students you want in the lunch line every day of the year, and they also hold special and wayyyyy better food for you people. Don't come prying our once a year treat off our table. Yah' jerk.
Aids don't even do anything. They just walk around and bug kids and break coffee mugs all up in the hallways. I'm walkin' here!!! Haha, really, they can't even give you the correct steps on how to do something if you ask for help.
THIS ONE is my personal favorite. All you adults that say that you always handle things better than children and are fair and nice...... suck on this. I am standing in the snack line buying a half filled, overpriced bag of New* healthy baked Lays chips, when I see a group of kids heading outside to at least get two minutes of fresh air before our 22 minute lunch is over. I then hear a mean aid say to another mean aid "I'll wait until they just get outside" and they smirk at eachother. SMIRK!!! Sure enough, as soon as one kid pushed the door open, the woman blows her obnoxious whistle. And she laughs. That's so rude, I cannot even fathom it. Don't taunt us with almost getting free from this little detention center and then drag us back in. A few days later, she did that to me and my buds, too. By now, I'm FURIOUS. So I go back to get my apple juice. And, while I'm obviously reaching for it, the same woman picks it up and goes "SOMEONE LEFT THEIR APPLE JUICE!" "Uh, that's mine! Sorry..." I say in the most sarcastic, unappreciative voice I can manage. "Well, thank you." the lady mocks. "Yeah, NO PROBLEMO." And I stormed my way out of the lunch room. That's right. Treat others the way you would want to be treated. That's the moral here. No matter if you're an adult or a kid, you still have to respect other people. That's all for now!!! :-)

Things That Purplex Me Are How Teachers Manage To Give You Chills Just By Looking at You and Why There Would Be A Boy In A Balloon

I don't know about anyone else, but I absolutley hate when teachers just look at you. Especially if you're working and they pretend you can't see them while they're glaring over your shoulder all croweded in your space. Look, I'm not blind. Could you leave me a little room to breathe? Thanks. Or even if you're the best working student ever, and they shoot you "the look" on accident, and you are frozen with shock. Like, "what the eff did I do!". I hate that. Happened at least four times today. God, I think I deserve a little more respect than that. Hahaha today, things are just crazy. Really! Everything now adays is just wacked out. Like that whole balloon boy shinanigans? What is that all about? Oh, and my favortie part of that whole thing is that people are so set on ripping on the fabulous Michael Jackson, that they manage to make more MJ jokes out of it. And they aren't even funny... Just upsetting. (To me). Example... Looks like Michael Jackson was ordering take-out in heaven again.
Wow. Hilarious. Haha those unappreciateve HATERZ. And Lady GaGa. When did she get here? She popped out no where and now shes the avant-garde superstar of the new millenium. No, I think "avant-garde" is the understatement of the century here. She's just freaky. I'm tellin' you, go back and listen to when she was at least PG-13 in her Just Dance song, then go listen to Bad Romance. Ra ra ra ma ma, Ga Ga Oo La La. Really? A second grader could have written a better song. Granted, I love freaky artists and what not, but this is just disturbing to me. But hey, for all you GaGa fans of the world, no disrespect. You have complete freedom and also have total right to call me an ass for dissing her.
NOTE: If any of you have a definition for the word "abariginy", please e-mail be at hoopsandyoyofreak@yahoo.com. THANKS.

Important Priorities Are Respecting All Music Artists and Setting Life Goals

My life goals
~meet Chester Bennington
~meet Mike Shinoda
~meet anyone from Linkin Park
~become a russian male ballerina
~floss

Music artists today are more appauling, shocking and even just pitiful than any of the songs that they could ever cook up. You have everything from Lady Gaga, to Miley Cyrus, to Bon Jovi trying to recreate his late 80's-90's one album success. But as much as you may hate some artists, I think it is still important to respect them. Granted, I did lose a great amount of it for Miley. I guess she was mad that there wasn't anyone in the ice cream truck to sell her a popsicle or something so the only alternative was to pole dance her frustration away. Putting the raunchiness aside, you still have to respect even the most re-verbed, electrically enhanced, horrible artists. You'll never escape it, so just accept it.

Life Scenarios Really Are Based on Two Things: Facts and Karma

I haven't blogged in forever. Cuz' blogging's for losers. So that;s why I'm here. :P truthfully, I forgot my password so I was unable to access my creation. Haha, never fear, the Brizz is back. I'd like to start off by sayin that YOU HAVE BETTER CHECKED OUT/LISTENED TO/BOUGHT ON ITUNES OR IN STORES THE DEAD BY SUNRISE "OUT OF ASHES" CD. If you have not, you're not allowed back to this blog ever again until you do. So, get on that. Now for a couple of announcements:
~HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRAD DELSON (December 1)
~HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY FLIP AND SAN (December 7 and 8)
~Thank you Pags for giving me the Paramore album Riot, you should all check it out. Everyone knows Misrey Business, so look into that, yo!
Yah' know what I learned today? One, that my music teacher makes references to Monte Python several times everyday and I swear to god, that we watches it everyday. Two, that reseraunts always make up their own crappy birthday songs to sing that go along with your free birthday dessert because Paul McCartney actually owns the rights to the song Happy Birthday (not the Beatles "The Birthday Song). Weird, right? No wonder the guys so famous, that song along must be raking in enough money to abolish poverty in Southern Africa! Cah-razy!

I'm one of those people, along with being a mindfreak, who just always gets the bad end of karma. It's real, don't you doubt that. Everyone loves reading about other people's ability to fail, so here you go.
Today at lunch, I decide it would be a fun game for me to sit at the end of the lunch table where everyone walks by, close my eyes, have my friends tell me when someone's coming, and then fling my limbs out into the aisle so as to hit someone. Well I hit this one chick twice, but she deserved it because you'd think she'd have learned the first time. GO AROUND. Then we took this little game outside and I was being guided through a parking lot and basketball court filled with a bunch of rude eight graders. I fell off the side of the sidewalk. Good fun.
I ALWAYS end up walking into people making out. I manage to look away and give a "sup" to someone right as there is a lip-locking couple in my path of travel. It's great. I've run into the same girl and her b.f. at least three times. One time, I ran into two couples in a row. NEW RECORD.
We all have days when we just aren't entirely there. During everyones favorite period of the day, something we cleverly named Core and More, we were learning a very complicated fourth grade skill called "Making Graphic Organizers." I now hold the record for the sadest attempt at describing something... ever. Mr. Vassar, being the good man he is, puts up with my "unique" way of learning.
He asks "Does anyone know what a graphic organizer is"
Me, thinking about what I'm doing after school or staring at some kid goes "Mmmmhmm!"
Mr. V shoots be a look, and I may have peed my pants either from the shock of being looked at or the fact that I'm now answering involuntarily.
"Can you define it?"
"Uh, no. No I can't, sorry."
"Alright, anyone else?"
....."OH WAIT YES! Yes, yeah, I can do it now! Yeah."
He calls on me.
"It's. It's uhh.... It's uhhhhhh...... It's a box..... With other boxes... around it??? And they have... ideas in them."
That's an answer deserving of a Nobel Peace Prize.
The other day, getting out of the car, I accidentally kicked a paper out of Katrina's car, and it blew underneath. I preceded to get the paper from under the car, while chewing on a piece of Ice Cube gum.
"I got it, I got it. Don't worry Katrina, I got it!"
After a solid 5 minutes of chasing the paper around in the wind, I catch it.
"GOT IT!"
For whatever reason, I made the noise of a cat with a hairball and swallowed my gum. A great way to start your morning is on a stomach full of winter-green goodness.